Tuesday, July 8, 2008

An Interview on Marriage With My Parents

35 years later....

Seeing that this year will be the 35th wedding anniversary of my parents, I figured they must have gotten something right. They were married at 18 and 20 (my mom the older) with my father fresh off the boat from Spain and very little English. They became devotees of Krishna together, raised three children, and pioneered several business ventures together, among other things. I think they've been put through the mill a thousand times... and are stronger for it.

So I decided to interview them on their experience.

I introduce to you Maheshvara Dasa and Brihan Naradiya Purana Dasi.

1. What does being married for 35 years mean to you?
Mom: It means to have a personal evolution with someone. Both of us have changed; we are not the same person we were 35 years ago: physically, spiritually, emotionally... we have evolved together. The emphasis is that we're not different - we have evolved.

Also, children are Krishna's way of making you humble [laughs]. It's an opportunity to realize how dependent you are on Him.

Dad: It means commitment to be together for the sake of a family and a loving relationship.

2. What keeps your relationship inspiring?
Mom: How we work together and support each other. With music, his business, my business, we communicate.
Dad: Music is integral to our life together. Kirtans and our spiritual experiences.

3. How does Krishna impact your marriage?
Mom: Krishna aligns us.
Dad: We feel most inspired when we play music for Krishna.

4. What gets you through the hard times?
Dad: Don't take things personally. Physiologically, men and women are just different. We both come with our own backgrounds. So take things in stride.
Mom: I agree. Be detached and just CHILL OUT.

5. What is advice you can give to anyone who wants to get married?
Mom: Check astrology - Chinese and Vedic.
Dad: Don't check astrology! [laughs]

Last words of wisdom?
Dad: PURE LUCK. We are the luckiest people in the world because we found each other.
Mom: I agree.
note: these pictures were taken in 07, not 02.

My three favorite quotes on this matter:
"Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love." Unknown

"If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were." Kahlil Gibran

"To love is not to look at one another, but to look together in the same direction." Antoine de Saint-Exupery


Sri Kisore Das said...

Dangerous Article!!!!

Super Inspiring!!

Keep it up Prabhu!!!

Babhru das said...

Dear Bhakti, please convey our congratulations to your folks. Satyaki and I celebrated our 35th anniversary this past April, and we can appreciate the long, happy adventure that is your parents' marriage. I like their comments about not taking things too personally. A sense of humor helps, too, sometimes.

Please give them our congratulations and our love.


Mandali Dasi Mendrilla said...

Thank you, this is priceless.
Your servant and friend, Mandali Dasi

Tarah said...

This is another inspiring display of your ability to bring out beauty and show people that the mundane can be sacred and worthy of our eternal devotion.

rasa said...

Your parents are both beautiful, creative people. You've come from such a dynamic duo! Thanks for the insights!
Love, Rasa

Gopapatni said...

Congrats to your parents from me too,they are an example for our younger generation to follow. I was blessed with a husband for 20 years until his passing. We shared some of the same principles as your folks still do. The stronghold of our relationship was a great friendship. Helping each other with everything from chores to children to advancement in Krsna Consciousness. That helped us in the years of his debilitating disease. We were friends to the end of his life and I was with him as he chanted Hare Hare, Hare...Thank you for this... keep writing and singing kirtan...Mother Gopapatni dd=>:)

nitchi said...

very sweet :)

tulasi-priya dasi said...

At the risk of sounding completely mundane: Gosh, your folks are absolutely stunning in that first photo! Talent, beauty, and piety—none of it gone to waste, because they engaged it all in the service of the Lord and His devotees. Congratulations!

maduxi said...

Say this to your father: Moltes felicitats, y que estigueu junts molts anys mes!

To write is to dare the soul. So write.